Friday, July 25, 2008

Gay Tips - How can I tell if a guy is gay or not?

Q: Can I tell if a guy is gay or not? I am 18 and it is impossible for me to find guys my own age. I have strong feelings towards some guys, but some of them I really think are gay and some I just wish were.?How can I know for sure? And how should I go about it?

A: An easy out is to cruise in locations where the community is predominately gay (gay bars, gay community social events, gay chat rooms, etc.). However, in most social settings, there is no quick & easy way to determine who is gay and who is not. Some of us have 'gay-dar', but no matter how perceptive you are, there is no stereotypical prototype for the gay male (despite what homophobes may tell you.

The real question at hand is how to determine who is attracted to you. The best approach is to be friendly. Most people smile back if you smile at them, and if they don't, they're usually not worth your time. You can find a topic of common interest and build a conversation with it. If you ask him casual social and non-sexual questions, you may find clues to his sexuality. After you've warmed up to each other and feel that the conversation is flowing naturally you can give a suggestive clue and see how he responds. If, for example, you are discussing movies, you can say, "Vin Deisel (or insert your fav actor) was hot in that movie. If he responds as if he's uncomfortable, you can discuss another aspect of the film. If his eyes light up, you have something to work with. I would suggest avoiding directly sexual questions on your first encounter. Even if he is gay, too strong of a come on can be a turn off. Unless of course, we are talking about a very sexual setting. For example, if it's 4:00 AM at the gay bar after the hot body contest, then by all means you can be more aggressive.

Body language also speaks volumes. One indication of interest is how comfortable he is getting close to you while talking. For example, if he leans in towards you as he talks or casually rests his hand on your leg while talking, he's probably flirting. A lot be can be said for eye contact, as well. If he pulls the classic glance at the crotch with a lingering smile as the eyes move up the body, then he's definitely giving you signals. Most importantly, keep yourself open to meeting new people and getting involved in gay-friendly activities.

from expert of http://www.interracialgaykiss.com

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Do we segregate ourselves out of comfort, distaste or are our needs not being met in the most diverse ways possible in as many instances as possible? There are already separate Prides for African-American and Caucasian men. Some bars and hang out spots differentiate themselves by the music, others by the crowd, yet others by the race of their clientele. America is no stranger to taboo nature of interracial relationships. After all, interracial marriages were prohibited under the anti-miscegenation law until 1967. And the United States is not alone: South Africa, Canada and Australia are among the countries that previously banned interracial marriage.

Is there still a cry of exogamy 40 years later? The issue is more complex than racism. Some individuals find comfort in dating or, even yet, are simply more attracted to guys within their own race without aversion for other races. But what about those with more universal attractions?

InterracialGayKiss.com member Dahighest says:
"I am a single African-American homosexual male who has currently been feeling a strong attraction to guys of other races. I feel that the homosexual lifestyle is highly segregated. For example, most of my homosexual friends are all Black and the couple of times I went to the clubs, there was NO diversity. I would love to potentially date a White, Hispanic, or Asian guy but I don't know how to even start towards meeting one. I realize that as I get older, my taste is changing and I am attracted to different things than I was say, a year ago. So, for anyone out there in an interracial homosexual relationship, how did you jump it off?"

Tony replies:
"You jump it off the same was as with someone of the same race. You go up to them and say, 'Hi, What's your name?' I find race to be a non-issue. Cultural differences can be an issue, but I don't see any reason to give much consideration to race. You are either attracted to a person or you are not. They are either attracted to you or they are not. The race of either of you is irrelevant if you like each other. What are your feelings on interracial gay relationships? Are you in an interracial relationship? How do you feel when you see an African-American man holding hands with a Caucasian man or a Caucasian man with an Asian man, and so on?

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Former 'spam King' Must Pay MySpace $6 Million

A Colorado man has been ordered to pay US$6 million in damages and legal fees for spamming thousands of MySpace.com users.

Scott Richter of Westminster, Colorado, must pay MySpace $4.8 million in damages and $1.2 million in legal fees, a court-appointed arbitrator ruled on Thursday.

Richter, who was once accused of pumping out more than 100 million spam messages per day, had been sued by MySpace in January 2007 in connection with an August 2006 campaign in which MySpace members were hit with unsolicited messages promoting a Web site called InterracialGayKiss.com. The messages were sent from phished MySpace accounts, according to the findings of Philip Boesch, the court-appointed arbitrator in the case.

The messages were sent to a MySpace community that was ill-equipped to deal with any security problems. At the time, "MySpace only employed two relatively junior staff employees to deal with these issues," Boesch wrote. The company's security staff has now grown to about 40, he added.

MySpace had been seeking a court ruling in the case, but in August 2007, U.S. District Judge George King of the Central District of California granted Richter's request to assign the matter to arbitration. Terms of the award were made public on Monday.

In a statement, Richter said that he and his company, Media Breakaway, were happy to have this matter behind them, noting that the arbitrator's award was 95 percent less than the amount sought by MySpace.

"We respect the decision of the arbitrator and we're not going to appeal it," said Steven Richter, the president and general counsel of Media Breakaway and father of Scott Richter. "We're going to pay the money he awarded."

This is not the first time a Scott Richter company has had to cough up millions of dollars to fight spam charges. In 2005, his previous company, InterracialFriends.com, paid $7 million to settle similar charges brought by Microsoft.

Scott Richter was removed from anti-spam organization Spamhaus' list of known spammers that same year.

Media Breakaway, which has no other spam cases pending, is doing everything it can to build a compliance team and make sure it is acting within the law, Steven Richter said.

MySpace said the Richter award was the latest in a series of steps it has taken to combat abuse on its Web site. In May, the company was awarded a $230 million antispam judgment against Sanford Wallace and Walter Rines.

"This award reflects MySpace's continued momentum and holistic approach to ridding the site of spammers and phishers," MySpace said in a statement. "We will continue to do our part in cleansing the Internet of this invasive onslaught of spam."